Truthful Tuesday

I have been doing a Bible study by Kay Arthur called Lord, I Need Grace to Make it Today.

We all need grace that only the Lord can provide. I know I surely do. And I have definitely felt His grace pour over me these past few months. Without His grace I would have done slapped some people upside the head instead of holding my tongue and being more like Him. Letting His light shine through me.

This study could not have come at a better time. Don't you just love how He works like that?

There are some things I have been struggling with. The two main ones are relationships and this pregnancy.

In my devotion a few weeks ago it said, "When you are weary and everything seems to be going wrong, you can still utter these four words: "I trust You, Jesus."

Once again, perfect timing from the Lord.

Let's start with the relationships, shall we?

Why are some relationships so difficult and hard? Whether it be a friend, mom, dad, sibling, husband, wife, children. There is struggle.

Some are hard work.

Some feel forced.

Some relationships where one person "thinks" they are better than the other and it always seems like they are trying to prove something. Bragging about this, or bragging about that!! I just don't get it!

We are merely passing through here on the Earth. For some people "wordly possessions" mean everything.

 And if it wasn't for God's grace, I would probably not held my tongue and shown grace to them.

If I confess I am a Christian, shouldn't I act like it in all ways.

What I say when I speak?

What I listen to?

Who my friends are?

Where I go?

"I trust You, Jesus."

And lastly, this pregnancy!

Oh man! The struggles!

We are thrilled we are having a girl!! People have asked me if I have started buying stuff? Nope! Nada! Zip! Zilch! Not one thing!

My struggle?

Sometimes I feel like God is going to take this girl too. I feel like He gave me a girl and I should be happy about that. And I am! My life changed SO much through Adyson's short life and I wouldn't trade it for the world. But it's hard for me to see past this baby living. That's where my heart is some days.

So about a week ago when I woke up and was bleeding, my first initial thought was, "OK. Here it is. She is not going to make it."

But then "I trust You, Jesus" quickly came to my mind and I had a calm and a peace.

Yes, I was still a little worried, but I know God has this in His hand and He is doing great work here.

I went to the doctor that day and my placenta had not moved up and was told to "take it easy" until my next appointment later in the week. So that's what I did and my placenta is where it's suppose to be. YAY!!! I was still to "take it easy" until my big ultrasound with the ultrasound tech. Until, last night, when I had a little more bleeding. None throughout the night or this morning. I still called the doctor and got a call back that said what I didn't want to hear-- bedrest and I have an appointment tomorrow. I held my tears until I got off the phone.

"I trust You, Jesus."

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.

Proverbs 3:5